Have you ever lost respect for a friend based upon their parenting choices?

I'm not talking about something small such as them allowing their child have ice-cream and cake for breakfast where you prefer the more traditional eggs and toast but serious stuff such as staying w/an abusive husband because they don't want to be alone or are alcoholics that send their children for your beer.Have you ever lost respect for a friend based upon their parenting choices?
well yes I have lost respect, but I don't see why it can't be over ice cream and cake.....what we feed our kids is very important and sets them up for a lifetime of food cravings and choices. I have one friend in particular who makes very self-centered choices in her life continually, showing me that her child doesn't come first, and I can't help but feel incredibly sorry for her child, and yes I have lost a lot of respect for her. I don't go to her for parenting advice! LOLHave you ever lost respect for a friend based upon their parenting choices?
I don't think I'd be friends with an alcoholic who sent kids for her beer in the first place. But yes, I've definitely lost respect for people based on sometimes quite minor parenting choices, where I've realised that they simply don't think the same things are important that I do.





';I am all about anyone choosing to vaccinate if the decision is informed, but they did not and would not look at articles or books about the pros and cons of vaccines and that I have a problem with';





And you consider articles and books written by a few individuals to be more ';informed'; than the recommendations of national boards because? I don't read scare stories either.





';Informed'; does not mean ';you accept the same authorities that I do';. I'd consider someone who read a few books and ignored medical advice on that basis to be particularly ill-informed.





Personal experience is different, of course. But it's also personal, and not much use to anyone who isn't you who wants to make an informed decision.
Yes, I have. My best friend has really bad house keeping skills. I'm not talking about her house is just cluttered. I'm talking about there is a trail to get through the entire house and there are roaches every where. She has even made a game for her daughter to kill the roaches that crawl across the floor. It's so gross and I don't believe a child should have to live in that type of environment. I also believe she should know better because my friend's mother kept a really bad house when we were growing up and was embarressed to have any one come over. My friend used to always say her house would never be like that, but yet she has let it get worse than her mother's was!!
Yes, I had a really good friend who I loved dearly but her son is out of control. I looked past the behavior but one day he finally did something that I could no longer look past, and her reaction too it showed me how truly different our parenting styles are.





He and my daughter are in the 3rd grade and I watched this boy after school for her and when I say he was a terror trust me I he was a terror. One day after school I caught him telling my daughter:





';Hey if I show this to you, you can't tell';





Naturally my mom radar went off like a bomb going off in my head. I asked what he was talking about and he said:





';Nothing';





My daughter knows better than to lie so she told me that he had something in his backpack but he did not want me to know about it.





When I looked in his backpack I found 4 laser printed color copies of PORN!! I lost it!! I asked him where he got it from and he blamed another boy which turns out the boy he blamed did not do it he did it.





I called his mom and she just laughed and these were the following gems of wisdom that came out of her mouth:





1. It is natural for boys to look a porn.


~I told her when they were 16 maybe but not at 9.





2. Why are you so mad, your daughter will have to learn about it sometime?


~I said and she has to learn the truth about Santa that does not mean I want her to know the truth at 8.





3. She sees you naked.


~I told her that was true but I don't do toe touches for the girl.








After some thought I realized that our parenting styles were too different and I called off our friendship.
Yes. I have a former friend that does not believe a child should ever be told no or given consequences. She also believes in going out and partying while her kids stay with her parents most of the time. The end result was that her child broke a few things in MY home and was also physically harmful towards MY son. Her child also doesn't listen to her own mother because of so little contact between the two, which makes me sad. I have casually addressed those issues with her in the past and she continues to ignore me. But when the safety of my child is at stake and her child is destroying my home, I have to put my foot down. I lost all respect for her parenting abilities and I hope she wakes up to the damage she's causing her child.
Yes, I lost respect for a friend who would smoke pot with her 2 young boys in the house. She also let her house get into the most disgusting mess, never played with her kids (her 2 year old didn't recognise 'twinkle twinkle' when I sang it to him), put them in front of the tv all day and her idea of cleaning up her puppy's *mess* was a quick go with a baby wipe.


I don't see her anymore.
Yes, I have lost respect for my sister and my son's godfather (DH's best friend). We have had a bad experience with vaccines and chose to stop vaccinating. I do not lose respect that these people have chosen to vaccinate, only that they have chosen to do so without doing research. I am all about anyone choosing to vaccinate if the decision is informed, but they did not and would not look at articles or books about the pros and cons of vaccines and that I have a problem with. We still have a good relationship with both, only we don't discuss this topic anymore at all. Also, my sister's daughter does have issues that aren't addressed that are potentially harmful. My niece has allergies, evidenced by random outbreaks of hives all over her body, she has yet to seek an allergist and allergies run rampant all over the family including many members (my sister too) of anaphylactic allergies. We have many members with epipen's.





Cathrl69 Now we've talked before, and you know what my situation is. As a contact of mine I would think that you would know that no it didn't have to be what I suggested, but they didn't look at anything at all pertaining to vaccines. I don't like scare tactics either, much of what I offered was middle of the road, and government sites including national sites like the national vaccine information center. Obviously vaccinating is a controversial topic and there are lots of pro and anti info out there the point is they didn't learn about any of it. I do have some contacts that are very informed and choose to vaccinate and some we have even swapped info. And I have read hundreds of books/articles/studies on vaccines over the past 6 years. The part about ignoring medical advice, that can be true for 1 son, but for the other two if you recall even our very provaccine pediatrician said he would give us a medical exemption based upon my sons' being allergic to several vaccine ingredients. We have heard the same from an allergist, he only offered a medical exempt for 1 son though. About the allergic reactions as a nurse anybody with random facial swelling, wheezing, bronchospasm and head to toe hives occuring several times a year it is irresponsible to not see a specialist. And my sister did see alot of our personal experience first hand.
nope none of that. the only friend i lost respect for was the one who had her child taken away decided to blame me for everything when i was not at fault because she decided to wait 8 months before fighting for him. it was child neglects. you could smell it and see it and anyone that hurts a child i loose all respect for
Yes I have. Like some one else stated she constantly puts herself above her kids. She is ALWAYS on her cell phone 24/7 no matter who she is with. And recently has been telling them she is ';done'; with them because they don't listen to her. I in no uncertain terms told her you do not tell your kids you are ';done'; with them. They did not chose the current situation but you do.She is going through a lot right now but that is no excuse for putting your kids on t he back burner for years.
thats horribale they dont sound like good freinds or parenting choices like you said the best thing to give it time im sure u can find more friends and people to help you wiht it go to a parenting group and talk about it get their imput but if there not doing a good job its hard but call social hotline think about the kids and cookies cake and ice cream can lead to obesity and childrens health issues im sure u can find more but i can surly agree with you i would lose respect if somebody did that to a kid ur like making them fatt and obesty thats jsut my oppion
Yep - sure did. We're still friends but not nearly as close as we once were. My friend is just getting divorced now and her husband used to phyically abuse her and their oldest daughter. He'd literally hold down the daughter and beat her. Why my friend stood by and let it happen is beyond me. So sad. And now they both wonder why she doesn't want anything to do with her dad. Crazy, huh?
i completely stopped talking to a friend because of her choices. she had a 3 year old and a 7 month old, any time they cried she called them cry baby b!tches. she told them she was gonna kill herself. she ';popped'; her daughter in the mouth and made her bleed but didn't feel bad about it
Oh yea a little....I do ';spank'; my kids, i don't necessarily every time once in a while but, i do believe in spanking, well my friend uses this ';woopin stick'; its like a huge wooden paddle! and i even told her but, lol she don't care!
Yeah, although we try not to be really judgemental, there are some things that are just so obviously wrong you can't ignore. Sending kids for beer, or worse keeping them around in an abusive environment are clear examples of some bad parenting.
I currently visit one of my girlfriends only about once a month because I can't stand how she handles her daughter.......she pawns her off on anyone she can and then can't figure out why she misbehaves. She literally only has her about 3 nights a wk.
ya. An ex friend of mine got a 97 000 settlement. spent it ALL in drugs n booze n partying and ended up losing her kid to her mom.
Yes I have, and a good number of people have lost respect for me because of my parenting choices.
Yes. I don't talk to her anymore. I don't keep company like that.